February 20, 2013

Tuesday’s musings

Good morning from Dallas!

Three mornings, three different cities. Vancouver, Chicago and now Dallas. We’re only three days into this trip and already I’m feeling scatterbrained. I’d like to wish anyone dealing with Derek early next week the best of luck!

I’ll rewind a bit to the last time we spoke. It was Monday and we had just landed in Chicago, which is a fabulous city I’m sure, it’s always too dang cold to really explore it though. Either that or I’m a West Coast wimp. Or both.

Didn’t do much Monday night, a little Behind the Lens, a little gym time, some peanut butter and jelly annnnnnd sleep – or at least I tried to. The hotel we stayed at is literally, like actually, so high that it’s in the clouds. That leads to a lot of wind, which leads to noise, leading to a lack of sleep.

Highlight of Tuesday morning: Zack Kassian walks into the lobby where a bunch of us were waiting to take the bus to practice. He pipes up: “anyone else have trouble sleeping? I think there were ghosts in my room…” Laughter ensues. Tons and tons of laughter. “Oh Kass,” said Kevin Bieksa, “so young, so naive.”

There weren’t any ghosts, at least not in my room, but it was a long night. Tuesday, as you may have concluded, was therefore a long day.

The team had game day skate at the United Center late in the morning. The boys were in a great mood, loose and jovial, everyone gave David Booth a Bronx cheer for his announced return to the line-up and it was smiles all around.

Bus it back to the hotel. Sniff out a Potbelly sandwich and hit up my favourite store on earth for some shirts and Polaroid film. Then back to work. Then pack. Then back to the rink. Then work again – but with a special guest.

Eddie Lack, yes theeee Eddie Lack, joined me in the press box to tweet the Canucks vs. Blackhawks game and we made the most of it developing a bromance rarely seen in Chicago press boxes. We laughed, we cried, we cheered, we ate. We ate. We ate. We ate.

We even made it on the TV – momma’s gon be so proud of her eldest not-girl!

Late goals from Edler and Bieksa and the Canucks earned a much deserved point (props to Cory Schneider for rocking out with his jock out in net with a killer performance) and it wasn’t long before we were back aboard Air Canucks en route to Dallas.

It’s actually 2:09 a.m central time as I type this and the lights of Big D are just coming into focus. Fitting, because my eyes are just going out of focus.

I’d like to thank Macklemore, Adele and Jay-Z, and a special seven-song mix, for keeping me awake, alert and able to function during the flight. The jumbo chocolate chip cookie at 1:53 a.m. didn’t hurt anything either. I still love you cookies.

Wednesday is a practice day. Dress and drive because there’s a basketball game in town, so Behind the Lens will be extra cool. Other than that I’ve been told by numerous Canucks that I need a haircut like someone drowning needs one of those Fruit Loop lookin’ floatie things.

If anyone knows a good hairdresser in Dallas, I’m all ears.

Actually, I’m all hair. Cut the hair, not the ears.

Derek

P.S. – Singing Adele on a team charter is frowned upon. NOW they tell me. All I did was set a little fire to the rain…

February 18, 2013

Peanut butter Jory time

Welcome to Chicago Canucks fans!

It’s windy here, as advertised, and we lost two-hours en route, so it’s dark already. Otherwise, what a city!

The hotel is gorgeous, the view from my room is even gorgeouser and the three peanut butter and jelly sandwiches I nabbed from Air Canucks are the gorgeousest.

Normally I blog while traveling, but some days the words just aren’t there and today was one of those days. I stared out the window into a thick mess of gray clouds for a long time; I couldn’t see anything and I could see everything. I was as sharp as a bag of wet mice all flight. And no, Jack Black didn’t do something funky to the coffee before Dave Grohl served it to me. I ride dinosaurs as often as I drink coffee.

I was going to live-blog the flight, or at least time stamp entries throughout the afternoon to explain what was going on, but the Canucks are on a new plane these days and it’s very divided. There’s a first class, then another first class, then the players, then the trainers. It’s all first class really, the plane is pimped out with wood paneling and the sink in the washroom may have been marble.

For some reason Jeff Vinnick and I were row 1 in first class with enough legroom a lion could have slept in between my feet and the wall in front. The only time I saw any Canucks was when they boarded – and yes, I got the gears from every one of them about being in the front of the plane.

I took full advantage by sleeping most of the flight. I also played Guess the Celeb Booty from whatever girly magazine Rory McGarry was reading. I went 0-for-8, which I think I’m rather proud of.

And now, presto, we’re at the hotel. The Canucks will grab a bite to eat and rest up for what is going to be an epic game Tuesday night at the United Center.

We’ve got a Behind the Lens gallery coming tonight and I just finished texting a very important someone who will likely play a part in Canucks.com’s coverage of tomorrow’s events…

Anything I should know about Chicago before I head out for a sandwich?

Derek

P.S. – Turbulence turns me into a 12-year-old girl, and that’s an insult to 12-year-old girls. Sorry Jada. (Just an FYI for anyone flying with me in the future).

February 18, 2013

Learning to fly

“What does he even do on the road?” - Alain Vigneault, would probably say…

“He eats way too much and he sat in my seat once…” - Henrik Sedin, definitely thinks…

“Jory, stop dressing like me - wait, is that my shirt?” - Kevin Bieksa, was bang on…

The reviews are in and because of Derek Jory’s enormous popularity traveling with the Vancouver Canucks, he’s onboard Air Canucks as you read this, en route to Chicago.

That’s right, someone 35,000 feet above you is working much less harder than you and probably eating sushi while doing so.

Just wanted to update everyone quickly that I, Derek Brennan Wayne Batman Jory, somehow convinced the Canucks decision makers to not only send me, but also photographer Jeff Vinnick, on a four-game in six nights road trip to Chicago, Dallas, Nashville and Detroit.

We took off this morning from Vancouver for Chicago and while you may think that not much happens during a lengthy flight to the Windy City, I’ll have a blog update and of course, a Behind the Lens gallery, for you as soon as humanly possible after we get to the team hotel.

Stay tuned to @VanCanucks as well, we’ll be tweeting goodness all trip.

As always, I’m just a fan who got some lucky breaks and is in a position to bring you behind the scenes with the Canucks. If you ever have any requests, story ideas or just want to say hello, always feel free to comment, tweet us, Facebook us or send me a messenger pigeon.

Talk from Chicago,

Derek

P.S. - No, I miss you more.

February 14, 2013

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Kathy Anderson knocked it out of the freakin’ park.

The witty CanucksTV reporter shot a Valentine’s Day video with the Canucks last week and she was prepared like few reporters would ever be - she made the guys custom valentines.

First things first, watch the video.

Now, the Fort Nucks exclusive, every valentine Kathy made for the Canucks. Print them off, cut them out, give them out, do whatever you want with them. It’s our valentine’s gift to you!

image

image

image

Which valentine is your favourite? The Jannik Hansen, Cory Schneider and Kevin Bieksa ones realllly got me. I’m still in stitches.

February 8, 2013

SuperSkills 2013

The 2013 Canucks for Kids Fund SuperSkills, powered by Rogers, goes down this Sunday Funday at Rogers Arena.

If, for some crazy reason, you were thinking of not going, snap out of it. There are mass amounts of good times to be had, more than is legal in some parts of the world. Click here to get your tickets.

This year Daniel and Henrik Sedin decided to choose not only the teams, but also who competes in what events. With the Canucks on the road, they faxed in the line-ups and, because we loves ya, here’s a sneak peak.

This is all subject to change and, frankly, I don’t really know whose writing is whose between Henrik and Daniel. I can barely tell them apart in person, let alone distinguish their handwriting.

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

More SuperSkill info:

This event allows Canucks players, joined by BC Minor Hockey team the Surrey Minor Peewee A1 Thunder, to showcase their skill and agility in six individual on-ice events and is a great and affordable way for families to see their favourite players in a fun atmosphere.

Doors will open at 12:00 p.m. as the Canucks Alumni scrimmage gets underway featuring alumni including Orland Kurtenbach, Dave Babych and John Garrett. Fans are encouraged to come early to see their Canucks Alumni heroes skate at Rogers Arena before on-ice activities with the current Canucks begin at 1:00 p.m.

February 7, 2013

Stickered

Just when I thought my head couldn’t get any bigger, Chloe made it smaller and stickier and now it’s bigger than ever.

Chloe, aka @penciltest, is an art student with a fondness for a Sami Salo slapshot who runs a few great blogs including http://azirae.tumblr.com/; it’s all a collection of incredible, adorable, original art and, as a fan of the Vancouver Canucks, she arts her favourite players as well.

Remember those amazing Canucks tree ornaments from a few years ago? (http://bit.ly/WDlQqN) Ya, that was her. She’s got mad skills and her latest endeavor is more pure solid gold.

Chloe recently took on stickers and did 22 Canucks, the Green Men and Sami Salo (Forever a Canuck) printed on 8.5” x 11” sheets. We posted a link to it on Canucks.com earlier this week. Killer stuff.

Then I looked a little closer and realized there was a player I didn’t recognize AND RIGHTFULLY SO! That ain’t no player, it’s me! Top row in the photo above, I’m second from the left between Zack Kassian and David Booth! A limited edition bonus sticker was recently added to the collection of yours truly, clean shaven - and she even got my new hair right!!!

I have decided that I will no longer be signing my name on contracts or cheques, I’m just going to carry around a roll of Derek stickers and use them when needed.

I never thought I could be so stoked to become a sticker. But alas, here we are. The only question I have now is if Chloe were to have made the stickers scratch and sniff, what would I smell like? A ripe ol’ mix of sweat, peaches, manliness, peanut butter & jelly and your grandparents’ basement, with a hint of freshly mowed grass, I reckon.

Thank you for the fantastic stickers Chloe!

And thank you even more for NOT making them scratch and sniff!

Click here for more info on how to order Canucks stickers – including me!

UPDATE

My head is back down to normal size. Apparently the sticker I thought was me, is not me, it’s some guy named Ryan Kesler. Sooooo for the time being, I’m back to being stickerless.

“I’ll add Become Sticker back to the list,” said Derek’s bucket list.

Sad emoticon in 3…2…1… :(

UPDATE II

CROSS BECOME STICKER OFF THE BUCKET LIST AGAIN - I’M BACK!

Just got a sweet email from sticker queen Chloe, with the following photo:

My head is back to over sized, I’m a sticker! My hair is a tad lot longer right now, the ladies like it that way (and by ladies I mean my mom), but I’ve got some facial scruff, which I always have. Awesome.

Chloe, my order is on the way!

February 5, 2013

azirae:

Canucks stickers printed on a full 8.5 x 11” sheet. They’ll be for sale after a few more tweaks (and after I refill the printer’s ink)

Beyond awesome!

February 1, 2013

Kesler. Millionaires.

1 p.m. Tuesday. January 8. 2013. Vancouver. Rogers Arena. Visiting dressing room 3. Ryan Kesler. A maroon jersey, pants and socks. Skates. Bauer gear. A backdrop. A plexiglass board. Lights. Lights. Lights. Jeff Vinnick. Cameras. A ladder. Red Hot Chili Peppers. Californication. Pose. Chin up. Down a sliver. Turn to your left. Your other left. Helmet on. Helmet off. Modeling. One of the joys of being injured. 15 poses. Faceoffs. Slap shots. Smiles. Frowns. Laughter. More laughter. Seriousness. Nine onlookers. One blogger. Wardrobe change. A tuque. A hat. A backwards hat. A scarf. T-shirts. T-shirts. T-shirts. Shirtless Kesler. Don’t look at his abs. Awkwardness. Laughter. More laughter. Fantastic photos. Honouring the past. Vancouver Millionaires. Derek Jory. Fort Nucks. Behind the scenes. Photos. By Severin Samulski. Enjoy.

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

January 23, 2013

KASS-TASTIC

Vancouver’s 3-2 shootout win over Calgary Wednesday night was big for a number of reasons. It was the Canucks first win of the season. It was the end of a three-game homestand with a three-game road trip upcoming #momentum. And it was Zack Kassian’s coming out party.

KASS-TASTIC was the best headline I could come up with for Canucks.com post-game and even then, ZACK ATTACK came to mind and I just rolled with that. How lame, I know. Not since Saved By The Bell was on has the name Zack and word attack been so overused. AND IT’S ONLY THE THIRD GAME OF THE SEASON!

Fast-forward to me getting home Wednesday night. Trade the suit for sweatpants, microwave some leftovers and grab a drink. That drink, because of he who shall be named in a bit, ended up on my lap.

When I checked NHL.com’s coverage of the Canucks game, the above headline is what I found. STRAIGHT KASS HOMIE. I read it once in confusion, twice in bewilderment, then took a sip and lost it! STRAIGHT KASS HOMIE - LIKE STRAIGHT CASH HOMIE, ONE OF THE GREATEST SPORTS QUOTES OF ALL TIME FROM NONE OTHER THAN MY MAN RANDY MOSS!

I emailed the NHL to give them props on the headline and was told it was the genius work of one Davis Harper, who I now consider a close, personal friend.

Writing headlines is incredibly difficult and Davis Harper pulled this off after 1 a.m. Eastern Time in New York. That’s today now, but it was tomorrow yesterday - the future. Whether you admire the headline as much as I do or not, rise from your seat, be it at your desk, the kitchen table or on the skytrain, and join me in as low clap.

Here’s to you Mr. Davis Harper.

Oh and good luck in the Super Bowl my Straight Cash Homie Randy Moss!